I rather liked Penelope Leach's "Your baby and child: from birth to 5 years" or similar title. Lots of "you may do X. You might do Y. There are reasons for either. It is up to you." I also found her quite reassuring on the "hey, babies/children do this stuff. Some do it at this age, some at that age. It's almost all normal".

In fact, that book lived in the bathroom for 4 years, for those brief reading opportunities when one could fit in a couple of paras on napping, or weaning, or going back to work.