Top of the Pops
I'm watching TOTP2 with my family. We do all talk a lot of nonsense, you know.
*
"Name a dead BeeGee."
"Er... Gibb. The one who died."
*
"Was that a womble?"
*
[Fairytale of New York]
"1987! I told you it was ages ago. She's been dead for years."
"I said *comparatively* recent."
"It's still ages ago."
"Why does nobody write any Christmas songs any more? Why is it always the 70s ones?"
"What, like the Darkness, last year?"
"That was rubbish. I can't even remember it."
"Yeah, well, modern Christmas songs are rubbish."
"Why don't they write any *good* ones?"
"The 70s ones were rubbish too. It's just nostalgia."
"Well, they were catchy."
"They were rubbish."
*
[something by Beyoncé]
"Cor, she's fit."
"She's a slapper!"
"Well, it's the same thing."
"No it isn't! Fit is, y'know, fit. It means you *would*."
"Well, she's a slapper, so *she* would."
"But that doesn't mean *you* would! She's a three-paper-bag job."
"I think I'm losing the level of this conversation..."
*
"Is that Kiki Dee? Wouldn't've known what she looked like. She looks like the Butterflies woman, innit. With red hair instead."
*
"Kevin! Isn't it."
"Mm."
"Kevin Rowland. ... Our gardener's got feathers in his hat."
*
When it's time for tea (I don't know what a traditional Christmas Eve meal would be, but it probably wouldn't be fondue) I will switch this computer off; this evening I will do something that doesn't involve using a laptop. I need a break from staring at a screen, and I want to go to bed before midnight so that when I wake up it's Christmas for the first time.
*
"Name a dead BeeGee."
"Er... Gibb. The one who died."
*
"Was that a womble?"
*
[Fairytale of New York]
"1987! I told you it was ages ago. She's been dead for years."
"I said *comparatively* recent."
"It's still ages ago."
"Why does nobody write any Christmas songs any more? Why is it always the 70s ones?"
"What, like the Darkness, last year?"
"That was rubbish. I can't even remember it."
"Yeah, well, modern Christmas songs are rubbish."
"Why don't they write any *good* ones?"
"The 70s ones were rubbish too. It's just nostalgia."
"Well, they were catchy."
"They were rubbish."
*
[something by Beyoncé]
"Cor, she's fit."
"She's a slapper!"
"Well, it's the same thing."
"No it isn't! Fit is, y'know, fit. It means you *would*."
"Well, she's a slapper, so *she* would."
"But that doesn't mean *you* would! She's a three-paper-bag job."
"I think I'm losing the level of this conversation..."
*
"Is that Kiki Dee? Wouldn't've known what she looked like. She looks like the Butterflies woman, innit. With red hair instead."
*
"Kevin! Isn't it."
"Mm."
"Kevin Rowland. ... Our gardener's got feathers in his hat."
*
When it's time for tea (I don't know what a traditional Christmas Eve meal would be, but it probably wouldn't be fondue) I will switch this computer off; this evening I will do something that doesn't involve using a laptop. I need a break from staring at a screen, and I want to go to bed before midnight so that when I wake up it's Christmas for the first time.

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I don't remember any of it now, but we laughed a lot at the time.
Families R Great.
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And I wouldn't know Beyoncé if she came up to me and said "I'm Beyoncé."
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