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Scatty-cornered
Sep. 6th, 2006 01:30 pmToday I feel utterly scattered. Things I want to say, thoughts I can't shape, conflicting ideas that I can't satisfactorily resolve, and nameless tasks nagging at the back of my mind which refuse to be dispelled even by to-do lists so comprehensive that they include basic bodily functions.
In the half-asleep wake of my clock radio I dreamed ( about spiders ) and I woke to find that I was nearly late for work.
Work feels fragmented, too. I'm still in various kinds of limbo, waiting for decisions to be made, not wanting to start anything major until strategies are in place, getting on with what I can in the meantime, and increasingly wondering if by the end of it all I'll still want to be where I'm fighting to get to. I feel like I'm trying to cram the expanding balloon of someone else's elastic schedules into a small wooden box.
Cup after cup after cup of coffee. My emotions are all over the place, angry one minute, aroused the next, tearful over trivialities, confused all the time. Unfinished sentences.
In the half-asleep wake of my clock radio I dreamed ( about spiders ) and I woke to find that I was nearly late for work.
Work feels fragmented, too. I'm still in various kinds of limbo, waiting for decisions to be made, not wanting to start anything major until strategies are in place, getting on with what I can in the meantime, and increasingly wondering if by the end of it all I'll still want to be where I'm fighting to get to. I feel like I'm trying to cram the expanding balloon of someone else's elastic schedules into a small wooden box.
Cup after cup after cup of coffee. My emotions are all over the place, angry one minute, aroused the next, tearful over trivialities, confused all the time. Unfinished sentences.
