Unrealizability of fantasies, strongly associated with personal sexual -- well, uselessness. And outside the work context the general non-specific guilt and downness associated with the aftermath of, ah, attempts at relief.
A lot of my fantasies are things I wouldn't necessarily want to realise -- good as fantasies, less good in real life -- so I guess I don't really get the oh-no-this-will-never-happen thing...
And I'm sure you know that you needn't feel guilty about, well, any of it, really, but I suspect telling you that doesn't help. Have you any idea why it makes you feel guilty? Do you think it's bad for other people to take themselves in hand, as it were -- should they feel guilty? -- or is it just you? Did somebody tell you it was Bad and Wrong?
Useless I meant more in the sense of hopelessness of getting together with someone than in relation to performance once past that hurdle, although I have my doubts about that too.
The guilt thing I don't think is subject to that kind of analysis -- it's a very visceral reaction to the moment, rather than a general view on the matter. I'd guess at least part, perhaps the greater part, of it is distaste for my body, and it's silly desires getting control of me.
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Date: 2004-07-27 04:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-07-28 01:02 am (UTC)A lot of my fantasies are things I wouldn't necessarily want to realise -- good as fantasies, less good in real life -- so I guess I don't really get the oh-no-this-will-never-happen thing...
And I'm sure you know that you needn't feel guilty about, well, any of it, really, but I suspect telling you that doesn't help. Have you any idea why it makes you feel guilty? Do you think it's bad for other people to take themselves in hand, as it were -- should they feel guilty? -- or is it just you? Did somebody tell you it was Bad and Wrong?
no subject
Date: 2004-07-28 02:53 am (UTC)The guilt thing I don't think is subject to that kind of analysis -- it's a very visceral reaction to the moment, rather than a general view on the matter. I'd guess at least part, perhaps the greater part, of it is distaste for my body, and it's silly desires getting control of me.