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theladiesloos. I don't know how to do a proper x-post on LJ, so I'll just say that if you've read it there, you don't need to read it here.
I'm SO FED UP. Since the beginning of May I've had stomach cramps and pain/discomfort, like having trapped wind all the time. It comes and goes, it's usually grumbling away in the background, sometimes it's just a vague feeling of not-quite-right, other times (like right now) it's bad enough to make me just want to curl up in a ball and whimper. Even when it's not too bad it makes me feel bloated and miserable and utterly unsexy (it's really hard to feel attractive when you're constantly farting like an old dog).
I've been to the doctor a couple of times. The answer, basically, is "we've no idea what's wrong with you". He's done various tests and they've all come back normal. I've got an appointment booked for next Thursday, and this morning I was tempted to try to ring up and get a sooner appointment, but I decided there was no point -- the condition isn't going to go away before then, but it's unlikely to worsen any more than this before then, and besides, they're not going to be able to get me an appointment outside work hours, and I can't call in sick with trapped wind, for god's sake. It never seems like it's quite bad enough at any one time to justify claiming that I'm too ill to go to work. It just goes on and on and on, and it wears me out.
In the meantime, nothing seems to make any difference. It doesn't seem to matter what I eat, or when I eat, or if I eat; indigestion remedies do nothing, the stuff the doctor prescribed the last two times did nothing; it doesn't seem to make any difference whether I stand or sit or lie down. There's nothing I can do, and I hate being helpless like this, I just want to know what it is and whether it's finite and whether there's anything I can do to cure it or even alleviate it. If somebody said "Right, you're allergic to everything except rice and water," then even that would be better; sure, I'd never be able to enjoy eating again, but at least I'd know that I could do something.
In addition to the stomach pains I'm getting worse and worse moodswings and attacks of depression. It's like something just bubbling up inside, there doesn't seem to be any way to stop it, I just start feeling nervy and angry and queasy and then something somebody says will trigger me and I'll just be spiralling down into awfulness. I don't even know how to explain it when I'm not actually in that state, it's just like everything burning up inside me, like a red mist, and I end up crying and shouting and being angry and violent and miserable. It's more like a fit or something than a 'moodswing'.
The moodswings seem to be coming in cycles of about 2 weeks, in line with the cycle of my Pill. I've been on the Pill for 10+ years (on this particular one for most of that time), and I've suffered from depression for all of that time (and then some), but it's only quite recently that my life's been settled enough in other ways for me to be able to observe the pattern like that. And the depression started before I went on the Pill, so it'd never really occurred to me that they might be connected. As for the stomach problems in relation to the Pill -- I've always had wind and dodgy bowels when I have my period, but judging from recent conversations on here that seems to be quite normal; but this recent stomach thing is more constant and seemed to come on very suddenly back in May -- so it seems unlikely that it's a result of something I've been taking for this long. I'd be happy to come off the Pill, less happy to try changing to different Pills as I don't want to spend the next howevermany months changing from Pill to Pill and never being sure whether it's the change or the type of Pill or other factors altogether that are making a difference (if any difference is made).
I want to tell the doctor all this, but every time I go to the doc with any physical symptom he asks if I'm depressed, and I know that as soon as I say the magic word "depression" all the physical symptoms will immediately be written off as the hypochondriac imaginings of a neurotic woman, and if I refuse to take YET MORE fucking antidepressants it'll be considered evidence that I "just don't want to get better". (Despite the fact that EVERY TIME I've taken ADs they've not helped at all and given me bad side-effects.)
There just seem to be too many factors altogether, it's impossible to do any sort of controlled experiment, and it's understandable that the doctor just looks at this mess and thinks "Hmm, obviously just a hypochondriac, just wants attention." But I'm not making it up, and I'd be quite happy to never have any attention again from the medical profession as a whole, and I do want to fix it, but I don't know how to untangle it all. I hate it. I want to outsource my entire digestive/reproductive system to Elbonia while they sort out what's wrong with it.
theladiesloos. I don't know how to do a proper x-post on LJ, so I'll just say that if you've read it there, you don't need to read it here.I'm SO FED UP. Since the beginning of May I've had stomach cramps and pain/discomfort, like having trapped wind all the time. It comes and goes, it's usually grumbling away in the background, sometimes it's just a vague feeling of not-quite-right, other times (like right now) it's bad enough to make me just want to curl up in a ball and whimper. Even when it's not too bad it makes me feel bloated and miserable and utterly unsexy (it's really hard to feel attractive when you're constantly farting like an old dog).
I've been to the doctor a couple of times. The answer, basically, is "we've no idea what's wrong with you". He's done various tests and they've all come back normal. I've got an appointment booked for next Thursday, and this morning I was tempted to try to ring up and get a sooner appointment, but I decided there was no point -- the condition isn't going to go away before then, but it's unlikely to worsen any more than this before then, and besides, they're not going to be able to get me an appointment outside work hours, and I can't call in sick with trapped wind, for god's sake. It never seems like it's quite bad enough at any one time to justify claiming that I'm too ill to go to work. It just goes on and on and on, and it wears me out.
In the meantime, nothing seems to make any difference. It doesn't seem to matter what I eat, or when I eat, or if I eat; indigestion remedies do nothing, the stuff the doctor prescribed the last two times did nothing; it doesn't seem to make any difference whether I stand or sit or lie down. There's nothing I can do, and I hate being helpless like this, I just want to know what it is and whether it's finite and whether there's anything I can do to cure it or even alleviate it. If somebody said "Right, you're allergic to everything except rice and water," then even that would be better; sure, I'd never be able to enjoy eating again, but at least I'd know that I could do something.
In addition to the stomach pains I'm getting worse and worse moodswings and attacks of depression. It's like something just bubbling up inside, there doesn't seem to be any way to stop it, I just start feeling nervy and angry and queasy and then something somebody says will trigger me and I'll just be spiralling down into awfulness. I don't even know how to explain it when I'm not actually in that state, it's just like everything burning up inside me, like a red mist, and I end up crying and shouting and being angry and violent and miserable. It's more like a fit or something than a 'moodswing'.
The moodswings seem to be coming in cycles of about 2 weeks, in line with the cycle of my Pill. I've been on the Pill for 10+ years (on this particular one for most of that time), and I've suffered from depression for all of that time (and then some), but it's only quite recently that my life's been settled enough in other ways for me to be able to observe the pattern like that. And the depression started before I went on the Pill, so it'd never really occurred to me that they might be connected. As for the stomach problems in relation to the Pill -- I've always had wind and dodgy bowels when I have my period, but judging from recent conversations on here that seems to be quite normal; but this recent stomach thing is more constant and seemed to come on very suddenly back in May -- so it seems unlikely that it's a result of something I've been taking for this long. I'd be happy to come off the Pill, less happy to try changing to different Pills as I don't want to spend the next howevermany months changing from Pill to Pill and never being sure whether it's the change or the type of Pill or other factors altogether that are making a difference (if any difference is made).
I want to tell the doctor all this, but every time I go to the doc with any physical symptom he asks if I'm depressed, and I know that as soon as I say the magic word "depression" all the physical symptoms will immediately be written off as the hypochondriac imaginings of a neurotic woman, and if I refuse to take YET MORE fucking antidepressants it'll be considered evidence that I "just don't want to get better". (Despite the fact that EVERY TIME I've taken ADs they've not helped at all and given me bad side-effects.)
There just seem to be too many factors altogether, it's impossible to do any sort of controlled experiment, and it's understandable that the doctor just looks at this mess and thinks "Hmm, obviously just a hypochondriac, just wants attention." But I'm not making it up, and I'd be quite happy to never have any attention again from the medical profession as a whole, and I do want to fix it, but I don't know how to untangle it all. I hate it. I want to outsource my entire digestive/reproductive system to Elbonia while they sort out what's wrong with it.
no subject
Date: 2005-08-25 11:49 am (UTC)My darling wife have similar symptoms when she ingests gluten, that might (possibly) be worth trying. That was a semi-quick on-set in her late twenties (as in "ramped up over about 6 months").
Other than that, all I can say is "listen to
no subject
Date: 2005-08-25 11:56 am (UTC)I really don't want to try random shot-in-the-dark dietary modifications where I cut out anything that might conceivably cause an allergy (and risk creating a sensitivity to the foods in question where none previously existed). And if I do go down the exclusion diets route, I'd prefer it to be on the advice of somebody with medical/nutritional training rather than somebody who has major psychological problems with the whole area of food and eating.
no subject
Date: 2005-08-25 04:34 pm (UTC)Gee thanks.
Whilst I know that I do have quite a few issues relating to food, at least I'm actively doing something about it and making adjustments to my diet which are making me feel better about food.
As I said in my initial comment I was surprised that your GP hadn't suggested an exclusion diet as its normally the first port of call for GPs who encounter digestive disorders. Its also something I wouldn't say that you shouldn't do unassisted as you have to be careful in how you remove and add foods. FWIW two days is not long enough for foods to stop having an effect on your body - the start of an exclusion diet is two weeks on rice, chicken and water. Only then do you start adding individual foods back in.
Whilst it does seem that there is a current trend towards diagnosing people with digestive disorders with a wheat allergy or similar, I should note that I was originally diagnosed with it back when I was seven years old. I had some work done by a kineseologist which helped suppress that until I was about 21 years old when problems started again, although it took me a while to pin it down on wheat.
Hell, for a while I thought that my reactions were psychosomatic until I had a bad reaction from something which I thought didn't have wheat in, but actually did. That, combined with the reaction I had from Hoegaarden was what made me switch from merely avoiding wheat to cutting it out completely.
I should probably also note that in my comments I have not suggested that you have an issue with wheat in anyway - my first comment didn't mention wheat at all and my second comment only mentioned it in relation to my own allergies, not yours. The second comment also noted that an exclusion diet was effectively the last resort and that your problems may well not be related to diet.
no subject
Date: 2005-08-26 01:48 pm (UTC)Great. And I'm doing something about my illness: I'm watching what I eat (and have come to the conclusion that it makes very little difference, but I do try to maintain a balanced diet anyway); I'm coming off medication which I believe may be aggravating some of the symptoms I'm experiencing; and in all this I'm seeking the advice of a trained medical practitioner.
So we're both happy. Hurrah.
no subject
Date: 2005-08-26 02:11 pm (UTC)From a later post it does sound like you've got a GP who is actually reasonably good in this area which really helps - my one is okay for most things, but when I went to her for help with the IBS-like symptoms I was getting she basically gave me a leaflet about IBS and told me to go away. When I went to her talking about having issues with food she gave me a leaflet for a local counselling service and left it for me to arrange to see them which is not ideal.
no subject
Date: 2005-08-25 05:21 pm (UTC)Your trapped wind symptoms sound a lot like what I had a couple of years back by the way; in my case it was just very poor diet (spent a year or so eating lots and lots of takeaways and frozen junk food, due to having a kitchen too small to cook properly in), so almost certainly not the same problem you've got, but you've got my sympathy, because it really is unpleasant! :-(