More job stress
Sep. 24th, 2003 11:07 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
j4The NHS want an application form filled in, although they didn't make this clear (or make the form available) before so I hoped I could just get away with a CV and covering letter. I haven't had time to do it (I loathe application forms anyway) and I need to phone them up and ask about the "how many days of absence due to sickness have you had in the last two years" question. I need to know how accurate they need it to be (I don't know how many, I don't have access to any records of it) and if I can find out subtly I want to know whether they check it with the employer.
And I've had email back from Analysys with three tests to do -- several hours' worth of tests -- as part of the selection process, which they want back "as soon as possible".
Wondering if I should spend Friday doing those applications instead of trying to get to the job fair that I was going to go to -- I don't know how useful the job fair would be; it sounded like a good idea but I wonder if I'm just trying to convince myself of that because if I can look for jobs I feel like I'm doing something.
I feel like I really shouldn't be going away at the weekend, as well, because I should be applying for jobs pretty much non-stop now that I know I won't have much work from ProQuest after the end of September; but I've got tickets for the event at the weekend and I don't want to waste the money.
On the other hand looking at the tests from Analysys I can't help feeling that I'm really overestimating my abilities in the jobs I'm applying for; being surrounded by frighteningly-intelligent people whose attitude is "You can do anything you want to do!" is all very well but in their case they can do anything they want to. I can't. I really honestly feel like I should just give up on the idea of trying to get a job that requires some kind of skill, and look for bar work or shop work or something instead.
I feel sick every time I think about it. Being in this job for three years has killed what little ability I had to think, and I can't see any way of getting that ability back. I have no skills and there's nothing I want to do anyway. I don't want to have to work. I don't really want to have to live, to be honest.
And I've had email back from Analysys with three tests to do -- several hours' worth of tests -- as part of the selection process, which they want back "as soon as possible".
Wondering if I should spend Friday doing those applications instead of trying to get to the job fair that I was going to go to -- I don't know how useful the job fair would be; it sounded like a good idea but I wonder if I'm just trying to convince myself of that because if I can look for jobs I feel like I'm doing something.
I feel like I really shouldn't be going away at the weekend, as well, because I should be applying for jobs pretty much non-stop now that I know I won't have much work from ProQuest after the end of September; but I've got tickets for the event at the weekend and I don't want to waste the money.
On the other hand looking at the tests from Analysys I can't help feeling that I'm really overestimating my abilities in the jobs I'm applying for; being surrounded by frighteningly-intelligent people whose attitude is "You can do anything you want to do!" is all very well but in their case they can do anything they want to. I can't. I really honestly feel like I should just give up on the idea of trying to get a job that requires some kind of skill, and look for bar work or shop work or something instead.
I feel sick every time I think about it. Being in this job for three years has killed what little ability I had to think, and I can't see any way of getting that ability back. I have no skills and there's nothing I want to do anyway. I don't want to have to work. I don't really want to have to live, to be honest.
no subject
Date: 2003-09-24 05:39 am (UTC)That doesn't necessarily mean you wouldn't be able to do this particular job, or the tests for it. It sounded from what you said to me earlier that you had a pretty good idea of how to approach two of them, but that the other one sounded more difficult. If it's for a technical writing job though perhaps the technicalese in it is deliberately written so as to be something you're unlikely to understand, and that none of the other candidates are going to know any more about it than you do?
*hugs* job hunting is pretty horrible no matter how happy and confident you're feeling, so it's no wonder if it's making you feel worse at the moment. I wish there was anything I could do to help.