I have just realised something I didn't want to realise. I would now like to unrealise it quickly, please, so that I can remain in denial a bit longer.
Does anybody have any good ways of stopping oneself thinking?
~ I don't really like making plans any more - ~ - it's just depressing because I know ~ they'll never actually happen.
Most things, even good ones, end in failure. Accompanied by deep depression and a total lack of belief and interest in the future. But most things start with a degree of optimism, or a clutching-at-straws relief at surviving the last failure and obtaining a ready income.
You mentioned Making Plans.
The actual plan, age 14, was:
~ Go To A Good University; ~ Study Medsun; ~ Distinguished career as surgeon or scientist or both.
The actual result, 20 years later turned out (in no particuar order):
Failed medical student, civil engineer, silver service waiter, private dinner-party chef, cartoonist, speechwriter, charity fundraiser and organiser, insurance salesman, conference organiser, kamikaze pizza-delivery boy, shelf stacker, impoverished part-time student, stock controller, DIY instructor & demonstrator, layabout, programmer, database developer, Visual Basic über-anorak, seasonal caterer for a pub in Ballylynan, systems analyst, consulting nerd.
Current status: ~ Absurdly inept student of the Martial Arts; ~ Occasional snowboarder; ~ Geekus Vulgaris (subspecies Leguminocomptator Londinium); ~ Dirty old man.
Current Plans: ~ Dan grade in Ki-Aikido, about 2 years off; ~ Start that part-time Msc in Financial Mathematics ~ 'cos I can afford to now, with student loans; ~ Remain single and a DOM, it sems to suit me; ~ Get out of the house more; ~ Redecorate. For the excitement.
I have no idea how any of this will actually turn out and you can see why.
Find a vaguely interesting thing and call it a plan. Or wait 'til it finds you: they seek out bright people. As a hint, your accumulated ramblings rants and burbles might be worth gathering together.
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Re:
Date: 2004-02-01 06:51 am (UTC)~ - it's just depressing because I know
~ they'll never actually happen.
Most things, even good ones, end in failure. Accompanied by deep depression and a total lack of belief and interest in the future. But most things start with a degree of optimism, or a clutching-at-straws relief at surviving the last failure and obtaining a ready income.
You mentioned Making Plans.
The actual plan, age 14, was:
~ Go To A Good University;
~ Study Medsun;
~ Distinguished career as surgeon or scientist or both.
The actual result, 20 years later turned out (in no particuar order):
Failed medical student, civil engineer, silver service waiter, private dinner-party chef, cartoonist, speechwriter, charity fundraiser and organiser, insurance salesman, conference organiser, kamikaze pizza-delivery boy, shelf stacker, impoverished part-time student, stock controller, DIY instructor & demonstrator, layabout, programmer, database developer, Visual Basic über-anorak, seasonal caterer for a pub in Ballylynan, systems analyst, consulting nerd.
Current status:
~ Absurdly inept student of the Martial Arts;
~ Occasional snowboarder;
~ Geekus Vulgaris (subspecies Leguminocomptator Londinium);
~ Dirty old man.
Current Plans:
~ Dan grade in Ki-Aikido, about 2 years off;
~ Start that part-time Msc in Financial Mathematics
~ 'cos I can afford to now, with student loans;
~ Remain single and a DOM, it sems to suit me;
~ Get out of the house more;
~ Redecorate. For the excitement.
I have no idea how any of this will actually turn out and you can see why.
Find a vaguely interesting thing and call it a plan. Or wait 'til it finds you: they seek out bright people. As a hint, your accumulated ramblings rants and burbles might be worth gathering together.