Displacement

[j4]

I can't seem to do anything. There's plenty of things I should be doing, but instead I'm just faffing around, half tidying things, moving things from one room to another, and constantly coming back to the computer so I can check that I still haven't got any new email.

There's people I want to email, too, people whom I haven't emailed for ages, but I don't know what to say, except "hello", and it always just turns into apologies for the fact that I haven't emailed them for so long, and I feel the need to explain why I haven't emailed for so long, which turns into whining, and then they won't want to hear from me at all.

I feel so empty inside. Tired of crying all the time, tired of being so tired. I don't want to do anything. I just want to go back to bed and sleep for a million years.

Comments

[j4.livejournal.com]

Never tried 5HTP. Never even heard of it -- is it widely available? I used to find that the Tesco herbal SleepAid things worked quite well, but I didn't want to keep on taking them all the time, even if they are just lettuce and stuff; besides, they don't tend to work if I'm just too stressed to sleep anyway.

What usually happens is that I faff around because I don't feel tired, and because I'm putting off lying-awake-thinking-and-stressing-about-stuff, and then suddenly it's 2am or 3am and I know it'll still take me ages to get to sleep, but I absolutely have to try by then otherwise I'll never get up for work, but I'm stressed and still-awake and I can't get to sleep.

I really do just want to sleep for years. And maybe when I woke up everything would have sorted itself out. It's not as if I'm doing anything useful by remaining awake.

[juliet]

Holland & Barrett sell it, so I guess it's fairly widely available.

I presume you know/have tried all the standard suggestions for sleeping - bath & warm milky drink before bedtime, having a destressing routine (calming book or whatever for half an hour before trying to sleep), that sort of thing. I find that getting ready for bed, & then sitting reading or knitting for half an hour makes me more likely to go to sleep quicker, because my mind's started the winding-down process. Relaxation techniques also work well for me, but I know they don't for everyone.

I'd also be inclined, if I were you, to make a point of going to bed at a reasonable time (midnight, I guess), even if you don't feel tired. The lack of routine may be screwing up your ability to sleep more. Try it for a couple of weeks to give your brain a chance to get used to it (& expect it not to work so well for the first few nights - possibly using 5HTP or the lettuce pills or something might help with that?).

To be honest, if your sleep pattern is screwed, sleeping for ages might not help - you'll just confuse it further. Long-term, the ideal is to get into a regular pattern of sleeping 8 hrs or whatever per night - the trouble is getting there :-/ I've also read that if you have trouble with sleeping, sleeping in at weekends is a bad idea, because you confuse your brain.

Oh yes - & dropping caffeine entirely can help. I'm told that even only a bit of caffeine can have more of an effect than you would expect.

Er. Sorry, you probably know or have tried all that already, in which case my apologies!